Oh, hi; I just got off the phone with my cousin Laura, the vet, to apologize again. As Mrs Sobinski told you, I sort of lost my cool at the poor girl round about Rememberance Day. Check that. I had a damned meltdown because of a misunderstanding on her part; since what little the Feds admitted about what happened back East was, at best, contradictory, it's easy in retrospect where she'd get the idea that, since the township council rubberstamped the AECL's plan sight unseen that it had popular approval. If I'd been a lot more rational and a lot less inclined to look for a reason to scream, I'd have simply asked her if she thought that sort of thing would have passed had it been allowed to be put to a vote; sadly, I wasn't in that sort of mood. That's because I'm right in the middle of looking at my future and it scares the Hell out of me. I'm not as dense as some of the things I've done make me look, you know; I know that I have as much chance of miscarrying as Deanna does and that knowledge isn't reassuring in the least. That doesn't, as I've said, make up for freaking out and making wild accusations because someone was in the dark. The trouble is that, even though I've reassured her, April and the rest that I went above and beyond the call of cloddishness, there's still a lot of residual tension that clouded holidays already made gloomy by wondering if Mom will escape from the Hospital again.
The other wave of anxiety also comes from Milborough; that's because Dad spoke out about Gavin's attempt to derail the inquiry. I have no real idea what it was that prompted him to do that or why he simply said that it needed doing. What I do know is that the old boy made a lot of pointless noise about how the garage people got to him too; not that Anthony or I expected different. I know how hard it is to let go of an idea so I sort of sympathize with him even if I don't like him or what he's doing.
As for Françoise, she's looking forward to her first Christmas as a big sister; it'll be a welcome relief from wondering what the Big Bad Thing that happened to Aunt Deanna was and why everyone is on edge. Reassuring her that she isn't why that is is sort of hard but it helps remind me what's at stake here; she, too, was born to a Milboroughite and stands a good chance of facing the same problems so it's a good idea to keep her from going all Annie Nichols on us and seeing it as being somehow her fault. It's as much her fault as Anthony's being stymied when I pointed out that we really haven't, you know, had a child that's biologically the both of ours (not it really matters, really) is his; I don't know whether we should risk it any more than he does so it's just another source of pain for us to work through, just another thing that makes our hearts feel full of broken glass.
In any event, I've darkened your day enough with our woes; let's hope your Christmas is a lot less turbulent than our own.
Yours,
Liz.