howtheduck (howtheduck) wrote in binky_betsy,
howtheduck
howtheduck
binky_betsy

The Pets' Letter, July 2009

The Pets' Letter, July 2009


Arf! Greetings from the animal farm! It's April...Mom said she was going to do the pets' letter this month, but then she started putting together pictures of her recent trip to Oaxaca, Mexico for her photo album and she forgot all about it. Yep, Mom's so busy putting together that photo album that she needed to buy a notebook to keep track of everything she has to do for the album. She keeps asking me questions about how to spell things like cerveza. I’ve been giving her the wrong answers, but don’t tell anyone.

When I'm retired, I'm not going to do anything. I'm going to sit on the beach with my MP3 player (or whatever we're using for music in 50 years) and read books all day. Anyway, you know what I mean. I'll be relaxing, not running around like a crazy person thinking I was living back 30 years ago.

So, the pets - they're doing fine. Edgar rolled in the mud out in the yard AGAIN, so I had to bathe him AGAIN. I know dogs have memories, because how could you train them if they didn't? Actually, mom says you can’t train a dog. She could be right. Nobody expects Edgar to clue in to things like that, because he's kinda dumb. Maybe Edgar just gets too excited to care if he gets a bath. I get drenched washing Edgar because half of the job is wrestling with him.

When mom saw me washing Edgar, she told me a story about how dad thought he could get Farley trained by taking him to only one obedience school lesson. After that he handed him off to Michael to train. Supposedly Michael came back from training with Farley smelling so awful it made Lawrence barf and hurl. Mom likes that story. You should have heard her laughing about it. Of course she still thinks I am dad’s hygienist, so she ended the story by saying, “Don’t mess with me little hygienist. Aladdin, my tour guide in Oaxaca thought she could get her hands on my husband and I taught her about barfing and hurling too. It was a little lesson I like to call ‘unwashed carrots and 10-year-old Imodium.’ After that, Alamode learned to keep her hands to herself.” I have no idea what she is talking about.

Whelp, that's it for this month. I guess I should have given you an update on Butterscotch too, but I didn't think of it because she's been in my lap this whole time. You always ignore things when they're right under your nose! Her nose is as wiggly as ever, and she's a happy bunny. We're going outside now! Cya!
Tags: retcons
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