It's MikeClone being filled with angst.
Panel 1: Although the camera angle makes it look as if the statement that people like girls better than boys (especially when they're babies) is RetJohn breaking the news to MikeClone that he'd better suck it up and deal, it's actually MikeClone pouring his heart out to his dad. Note to Lynn: you used to be able to show us who was talking in the old-runs. WTH happened to your draftsmanship?
Panel; 2: MikeClone starts in with the "Nobody loves me/Everybody loves NeoLizic" mantra that justified years of "Lizardbreath" as a means of payback. RetJohn tries nipping that in the bud by telling him that's not true. We've seen almost thirty years of that not working worth a damn.
Panel 3: He then tries and fails to console his son by informing him that toddlers like Liz need more attention than kindergartners. As a larger child, he can take care of himself more than she can.
Panel 4: The reason he fails is that a five-year-old will misinterpret his statement to mean that he's ready for adult responsibilities. In MikeClone's case, that means driving lessons.
Summary: This might not mean driving lessons but it might make RetJohn think that getting MikeClone a PUPPY might make him feel better. At least that's what he'll tell RevElly to pressure her into getting Fauxley a few weeks from now.
ETA: In case anyone cares, Panel 3 is the source of the latest banner.