Panel 1: Ah, so here's the song from the main page! And she's going to raise...
Panel 2: Hee, hee, hee. How sad that the Lynnions are reduced to cribbing from childhood rhymes. (You know: Miss Lucy went to heaven and her steamboat went to...Hello operator...) And I see what Apes got for her birthday: full-fledged Patterson butt! Elly looks really irritated, like she's thinking, "I'm doing this for YOUR sake, and all you can do is play that sick. disgusting. electric. twanger?!" (Bonus points for anyone who gets the reference.)
Panel 3: Gerald, quit making suggestive remarks in front of your girlfriend's parents. Eva, it's not that cold; you don't have to wear earmuffs. Mike an' Dee, I hope you're just here for the cake-cutting and that's it. If your spawn are hanging around, it's not a teenager's birthday party, is it. Especially if Robin starts setting up a howl because he wants a rose on his piece. Liz, yes, I see your Patterson butt; very nice. It looks like smoke is coming from your camera, but then I realized it's the gap between Eva's arm and torso.
Panel 4: Heh, Gerald still sucking up.
Panel 5: I would tell Gerald to shut up some more, but I'm dazzled by April's face. She looks like a sixteen-year-old, and a striking one! And that looks like a cool cake, too. But why are the plates so wildly different in size?
Panel 6: Shouldn't you be facing people when you thank them? Or is your back to Mike an' Dee because they didn't give you anything? Wouldn't surprise me.
Panel 7: Well, all right! She gets to go out, and stay out!
Panel 8: Ah, cripes. Did you by any chance take notice of her development? She did not get to be sixteen overnight.
Panel 9: Sixteen is not all grown up. If April was all grown up, she'd have moved out by now.
Panel 10: Ugh, I don't even want to know. They both look so weatherbeaten, like those photos of Dust Bowl refugees.
Panel 11: Yeah, sure you did.