August 16th, 2021

howbandaid

Wednesday, 18 August 2021

(Originally published Wednesday, August 19, 1992)

The one where Mike is granted the opportunity to give Martha the break-up he had originally planned to give her until she ruined it by breaking up with him first.

Panel 1: Exposition.  The points are:

  1. Gordon knew Martha was working at the BURGERS place

  2. Gordon brought Mike to Martha’s workplace on purpose.

  3. Mike thought he was going to get a food bargain and that’s not going to happen.

  4. Mike actually realizes Gordon set up him up (smart)


Panel 2:  Gordon tells Mike that Martha is OK.  Then he says, “She wants to, you know…talk.” When someone says it that way with a big “you know” in it, it means that she wants to do something other than talk, but Mike is not bright enough to pick up on that, so he says, “About what?”

Panel 3: “No way!  Negative!  Nyet, not, NO!!”  It’s interesting that of all these ways of saying, “No”, “nyet” manages to make it in.  Why “nyet”?  When I say a string of “no” words, I tend to include, “Nada, nein, non and negatory.”  However, more interesting than that is that Michael immediately leaps to the conclusion, “An’ she wants to go back to me?” after Gordon says, “Well, Jason dumped her, an’”   Ultimately Martha is not going to say that, so it does make me wonder what Gordon was going to say if Michael had not interrupted him:


  1. Martha wants to get together seriously (what Martha says in 2 days and we are not sure what "seriously" means.)

  2. Jason gave her herpes and she thinks you should get checked.

  3. Thanks to you and Jason, Martha realizes she likes girls better and she wanted you to know.

  4. Martha is interested in Brian Enjo but does not want to date him if it’s going to cause trouble with you.


Panel 4: Mike looks at Martha with her arm fully extended toward something cylindrical splashing near her hand and it reminds him of something.   What could it be?  He thinks, “…I think”.   I seem to remember that famous saying of René Descartes, – “I think ‘…I think,’ therefore I am ‘…I am’.”

Summary:  I am not sure why Martha thought this was a good idea, but I have certainly seen my fair share of girls who went back to boyfriends they did not particularly like.  I have never seen it go well.  The funniest part of the story is how Gordon is setting this up.  If Martha wanted to talk to Mike, you would think a phone call or a meeting at some place that was not noisy would be a better choice.  After all, how much conversation are they going to get over the cash register while she is busy working?   It shows us that Gordon knows a lure for Michael is food.  Michael may not want to talk to Martha, but he has to talk to her to get to that burger.