May 15th, 2021

Snarky Candiru2

Monday, 17 May 2021

The one where Phil makes bad wordplay about the dog tied up outside all night long so he can go crazy.

Panel 1: Georgia tells Phil not to sink to the level of low class jerkoffs who tie a dog outside so it can go insane because they think it protects them from whatever the alarmist media tells them to be afraid of and deal with their crap in the morning.

Panel 2: She then takes a glass of hot milk out of the microwave and gives it to him so he can relax.

Panel 3: As the poor dog goes nuts from boredom and isolation and also because it wants the intruders to leave its territory, Phil whines about the injustice of it all. A man's home is supposed to be his castle.

Panel 4: This sets up bad wordplay about how Porker the dog is the dragon next door.

Summary: Phil doesn't actually have a dragon next door. What he has is a territorial pack animal who has no fucking clue (and never will) that what it thinks of as its territory is someone else's home. Dogs can't read petitions, they have no God-damned idea what leashes mean and they don't and can't understand a human-imposed boundary. Anyone lucky enough to deal with Farley knows those last three things better than a Patterson ever will.