December 29th, 2019

Snarky Candiru2

New Years Eve 2019

The one where John and Elly ring in the New Year by kissing in their sleep life solid, sensible adults are "supposed" to.

(Original Publication Date, 31 December 1990)

Panel 1: It's late at night on New Year's Eve and John and Elly are fast asleep instead of at a party. Parties are bad. Parties are wrong. Parties force pooooor, ill-used Lindy to have to learn who new people are. Lindy is so cruelly mistreated that her horrible mother forced her to have to learn who a kid brother is. Lindy had to grow up and have to learn who children are but she showed the cruel people who want her to learn new things! She hid away until they were grown and missed everything about their lives.

Panel 2: For some reason, John breaks just enough out of his beloved stupor so that he can notice that it's midnight.

Panel 3: He kisses a still-asleep Elly to celebrate the new year like sane, sensible adults who have no social lives thereby pandering to the army of drab, joyless murmuring nitwit housewives she calls a fanbase.

Panel 4: They go back to their zombie-like repose because They Know Better Now, don't they, Bouffant Betty?

Summary: This is Lynn's vision of domestic bliss: pointless busywork, joyless monogamy, random periods of unconsciousness, hanging out with old friends and talking about old times and old places while spurning the new in horror and contempt and then, sweet, sweet Death.