September 13th, 2019

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 15 September 2019

John buys himself a metric-frakkton of trouble by taking all day to remember a casual acquaintance's name.

(Original Publication Date, 16 September 1990)

Panel 1: We find ourselves watching John walk down Main Street. As he does so, an unknown woman looks at the camera so as to tell us that she somehow becomes important.

Panel 2: She becomes important by identifying John by first name.

Panel 3: The strip proper begins with Whoever This Person Is giving him his full name and telling him that she hasn't seen him in years. She is thus perhaps either one of his and Elly's neighbours from back when they lived in Toronto in the mid-seventies or someone he knew long before Elly came into his life.

Panel 4: We set up the joke by having John smile and think to himself that while he remembers her face and who she is, he cannot remember this woman's name. We thus begin Lynn's attempt to reach out to old friends via comic strip by having him ask himself if her name is Lois, Lorriane or Kathryn.

Panel 5: As she tries catching him up on the last ten years, he asks himself if she is Amy, Annette, Beth, Corrine, Denise or Esther.

Panel 6: As they part company, he wonders if he's been talking to Sharon, Charlotte or Jill.

It should be noted at this point that he could have saved himself from the pillow to the face he's going to get at any time by simply pointing out that he'd forgotten her name. Since he doesn't want to look stupid, he didn't do that.

Panel 7: A while later, he gives Elly a chaste peck on the cheeck as she takes some Little Orange Surprise out of the stove. Since she can't see his face, she doesn't know that he's trying to remember something.

Panel 8: As he reads his evening paper, he's still trying to fighure out who Mystery Person is.

It should also be noted that he could have simply asked Elly if she remembered this person they knew from the big city and avoided the cold shoulder he's gonna get. He doesn't because he doesn't wanna look week.

Panel 9: Hours later, we find them in bed.

Panel 10: John alarms Elly by shouting out the name "PATRICIA!!!!!"

This is probably because he usually says "Medium double-double and an everything bagel with cream cheese!" at this time of night. Also, she remembers something that he suppresses: a Patsy O'Connor who dumped him back in tenth grade.

Summary: As I said, John could have easily escaped from what's going to be another long, pointless beef that he will never be forgiven for by simply getting off his high horse and saying "I'm sorry but while I remember who you are, I don't remember your name." Since that would mean a mild bit of public awkwardness and an admission of ignorance, he just smiled politely as he strolled towards another apocalypse.