September 24th, 2018

Snarky Candiru2

Wednesday, 26 September 2018

When Mike tells Elly that most of the reason that she feels old is that she acts like her mom's older sister, Elly's fear of modern anything reminds us that just as she wants to feel too fat to be worthy of love, she wants to feel that her life is all used up and over.

Panel 1: The next morning, we find Mike telling Elly that the reason she feels old is that she lives like an old person and calls her attention to the food she eats.

Panel 2: He then alarms, saddens and confuses her by categorizing the cream of wheat, oat bran and high fiber cereal of guaranteeing health and proving how much she loves her children she eats as fogey food.

Panel 3: He then pours her a bowl of sugar cereal and tells her to listen to headache music as it will halt the aging process.

Panel 4: She gazes at the bowl of Sugar Shocks and boombox playing "Let Your Backbone Slide" in horror and thought-bubbles "Right! This stuff will kill me!"

Summary: What's needed is someone like Jim to make dismissive comments about how 39 isn't "too old to live"; granted, Elly won't listen because despite spending her life howling about how cruel and unfair it is that she never feels happy, she fears and hates the idea of actually being happy for that way lies being called a grinning simpleton but at least bullshit would be called by someone she can't talk back to.