February 23rd, 2018

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 25 February 2018

John is made to look like an incompetent idiot dentist because he makes the wrong person relax so that Lynn might avenge herself on people who try to help her calm down.

(Strip Number 7265, Original Publication Date, 12 February 1989)

Panel 1: We start things off with John dealing with his least favourite sort of patient: a frightened child named Geoffrey who does not want the big man with the scary tools jamming sharp objects in his mouth. John tells the struggling child to simply open his mouth so we can take a look inside.

Panel 2: Geoffrey hollers "Don't touch me!!" because of that fear of pain children pretend to have to make Lynn feel bad.

Panel 3: Since it's all kinds of obvious that Rod is being mocked for indulging children who simply need to be threatened into compliance, John tells an unsure-looking Geoffrey that today, we're going to be trying relaxation techniques before we look in his mouth.

Panel 4: Geoffrey is told to lean back and just let himself go limp.

Panel 5: He tells him to think of a warm, sandy beach as well as to imagine that there's a gentle breeze and the sound of water lapping against the shore.

Panel 6: He tells Geoffrey to breathe deeply and exhale slowly. With each outward breath, he should feel the tension flowing out of his fingers.

Panel 7: In a calm. somnolent voice, John tells Geoffrey "You feel heavy.....you sink into the soft, warm sand...."

Panel 8: He concludes by telling Geoff "Your arms are heavy, your mouth is open and you feel yourself drifiting into a gentle state of relaxation."

Panel 9: Now that Geoffrey is asleep, John tells Jean to pass him the topical anesthetic that will make this painless.

Panel 10: John is gobsmacked because Jean has also drifted off to sleep and is snoring.

Summary: This is supposedly funny because we're asked to mock Rod for wanting to put a child's mind at ease instead of putting a mask over his face and narcotizing him into submission like he's "supposed" to. In Lynn's angry mind, children only pretend to feel fear and discomfort to be cruel to adults anyway so Rod/John should just fucking gas the lying monsters for breaking Mommy's heart and forgetting that she's a real person with real feelings with their evil LIE about how yanking their hair hard HURTS!!! (After all, Lynn doesn't feel a damned thing so the brats must be lying!!!)