November 13th, 2017

Snarky Candiru2

Wednesday, 15 November 2017

Elly continues to be a dull-minded old woman who doesn't have the least idea who her kids are when their enthusiasm about insulting people undetected astonishes her.

(Strip Number 1367, Original Publication Date, 16 November 1988)

Panel 1: A delighted Michael tells Lizzie that Mom's right about how great thesauri are. This is because there are at least fifty synonyms for 'stoopid' that no one ever uses. Perhaps next, he can look for synonyms for 'presumptuous', 'ignorant', 'insensitive' or 'wrong-headed' because Lynn's aggravating (whoops....there's another word he can look up) need to hammer home how 'superior' her way of saying 'stupid' is to the millions of Americans reading her lovely column impress me as being a graceless, tone-deaf recurring irritant that should have been discouraged by the Syndicate.

Panel 2: Lizzie is equally thrilled because she has found just as many ways to call someone 'ugly' without being detected.

Panel 3: Since Elly isn't especially aware that she's busy raising trash-talkers and also believes in magic, she assumes that their learning the value of a good thesaurus will convert them into polite, right-thinking, well-spoken drones by magically pushing those cuss words right outta their heads.

Panel 4: When told how ever neat it's going to be that he and Lizzie can shred everyone they've ever met and not have them understand how thoroughly they've been owned, Elly responds to Mike's boast by going into safe mode.

Summary: What interests me is not that Elly is too dim to have foreseen this. What interests me is what words they looked up synonyms for. Mike wants to call everyone he meets an idiot because he feels anxious about his grades (and is also a pea-brain) while the Lizzie who's busy convincing herself that she's too ugly to be loved because no one lets her trade on her looks to the extent John used to wants to reassure herself that her accusers are hideous freaks who aren't entitled to an opinion because they're ugly and thus bad.