October 31st, 2017

Snarky Candiru2

Thursday, 2 November 2017

We say goodbye to Dirk so we can remind ourselves of why Elly needs to jump up and down on Martha. After all, how can she have everything in common with Connie if she ain't panicking about Mike and THAT GIRL knocking boots?!

(Strip Number 1363, Original Publication Date, 2 November 1988)

Panel 1: We find ourselves watching Dirk ask Connie if Molly's ready. Connie says yes and that she'll go and call her down.

Panel 2: We find ourselves in Connie's kitchen as an incredulous Elly asks if Molly is still going out with the UGLY boy of being UGLY and thus BAD. Since Connie is the same sort of panicky, superficial clod obsessed with being presented with pretty grandbabies as a way of saying thank you for horseshit non-sacrifices Elly is, she uses scare quotes when she states that they're an item.

Panel 3: We get a hint as to why this ugly boy is the devil when panicky incompetent Connie blathers about how it's a serious problem that this horrible person is there until 10 every night. Elly asks Connie how she puts up with it.

Panel 4: Connie states that chastity begins at home and leaves it there.

Summary: So long, Dirk. You deserved better than to be the bogeyman to two judgmental nitwits who could tie for first prize of Panicky, Cement-Headed, Short-Tempered Catastrophic Failure Mother Of All Time. Ah, well. At least this leads to a revelation that Connie is less a wife than she is a highly-paid babysitter.