October 13th, 2017

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 15 October 2017

We slam Aaron and Katie for something that happened in Lynn Lake when Mike and Lizzie hatefully and criminally believe that mothers aren't allowed bed rest like everyone else.

(Strip Number 6735, Original Publication date, 16 October 1988)

Panel 1: Since the splash panel has Elly sick in bed, I think we fungus people who want refugees in war zones to die of world diseases can depress Lynn and take away her desire to do the strip by predicting that at some point, her idiot family want her to work through her illness because her making them dependent on her shouldn't mean that they're dependent on her.

Panel 2: Elly noisily blows her nose.

Panel 3: We sort of predict the future when Elly tells us that she hasn't felt this awful in ages. This is because the last time she felt this awful, EVIL MIKE WHO NEEDS TO BE SLAPPED UNTIL HE ADMITS THAT HE LOVES CHAOS AND HATES HIS MOTHER didn't want to admit that mothers can so get sick because CHILDREN ARE CHAOS-LOVING, MOTHER-HATING SPONGE CREATURES WHO ARE NEVER SORRY.

Panel 4: She thought-bubbles that she's not going to survive her pounding headache and sore throat.

Panel 5: Having noticed that she grabbed nothing but air the last time she grabbed for a facial tissue, Elly is goggle-eyed in horror as she notices that the box is empty.

Panel 6: Terribly ill Elly takes the new box of facial tissue down to her room in the doomed hope that she can get back to bed to die of The Fever and the cruelty of her selfish children who never notice what she does until she stops doing it.

Panel 7: Since Evil, Selfish Mike sees a mother well enough to move around because of his long-term plan to go to his grave never admitting that poor Elly is a human being with wants, hopes and needs, he babbles idiotically about having company over, needing to be chauffeured and wondering what lunch is and when it's to be served.

Panel 8: It's Lizzie's turn to oppress and destroy the mother she hates by being another babbling, smiley-faced dimwit running HER yap about having her hair braided and baking cookies.

Panel 9: Elly bellows "What makes you think I'm well enough to do all that stuff" because she doesn't want to admit that her children aren't so much mean and selfish and cruel as they are rock fucking stupid.

Panel 10:: When Lizzie says that it's because she's standing up, Elly is, as always, gobsmacked. She wants to believe that her children want to work her to death because they hate her because admitting that the pea-brains can't connect the concepts of "Mom" and "too sick to move" because all they've got upstairs is two neurons tied together in a slipknot is too upsetting.

Summary: The odd thing is that this synchronizes with the week to come. "Moms can't take sick days" meshes quite well with "Actually wanting Mom around for a change 'really' means that she's just some slave who can't expect thanks or acknowledgment."