July 14th, 2017

Snarky Candiru2

Saturday, 15 July 2017

Mike makes a big, freaking deal about how Lizzie and Dawn are NOT ALLOWED to know what super-awesome things go on in his and Brian's manchild cave only to have it revealed that most of what goes on is his having not a blasted clue of what to do with his free time without someone barking orders at him.

[Strip Number 1315, Original Publication Date, 15 July 1988)

Panel 1: We find Mike pointing to the fridge box and angrily explaining to Lizzie that the comically misspelled version of "Private: No Girls Allowed" on the fake door means "take a hike."

Panel 2: Since we've seen that the sullen jerk has no problem trying to beat the tar out of a slip of a girl a third of his size because he's angry, I believe him when he says that it'll be game over if she and Dawn intrude on his and Brian's privacy.

Panel 3: He goes full Charlie Sheen on us when what the two of them are gonna do these is top secret, private and none of their business.

Panel 4: When we get to see the crazy awesome stuff that the girls aren't allowed to see, Lynn proves the point Brian makes next week about how dull people with dull minds lead dull lives when he and fellow dull young boy Mike ask one another what the other boy wants to do because they're both running on empty idea-wise.

Summary: Watching Michael in action almost always reminds me of watching a dog chase a car because he's got no blasted idea in his empty head of what to do when he achieves a goal. He needs someone to stand over his shoulder telling him what to do 24/7 because he has no ideas of his own but he's too stupid and vain to understand this and brays witlessly about the curse of not being boring and ordinary.