August 28th, 2016

Angry Candiru

Monday, 29 August 2016

We begin the back to school arc with Elly not being able to quite cope with the fact that Mike is starting to transition from Evil Linus Van Pelt to Failed Cool Kid.

(Strip Number 1197, Original Publication Date, 31 August 1987)

Panel 1: When Elly expresses disbelief that Mike's going to wear a white shirt, white trousers and white shoes to school, he tells her that everyone's wearing white.

Panel 2: She tries to remind him that he's going to be racing around a playground like a maniac and thus leave her with stains to clean.

Panel 3: John cuts her off before she can stick her head in the oven and reminds her that sixth graders like Mike don't charge around playgrounds any longer.

Panel 4: He then delivers the first shot across the bow of the HMCS Pants Soiling Fear Of Adolescents by shivering in horror as he says that they loiter.

Summary: Mike isn't even a teenager yet and already, we get the whole entire "Today's rotten punk kids want to kick the dirt into our graves" gospel from a fear-filled idiot cartoonist. HONESTLY!!!! Why did these two idiots bother having children if they're only going to squeal in horror at every God-damned thing they do or say?! Was it so they could be miserable, confused, terrified and angry all the time?!