August 16th, 2014

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 17 August 2014

In today's strip, Lizzie ruins Elly's life forever because she criminally ushers in an era of chaos wherein her pooooor mother is the victim of cruel cruelty by refusing to eat her perfectly good and not-at-all mushy, salt-laden and tasteless peas from a can.

(Strip Number 7194, Original Publication Date, 18 August 1985)

Panel 1: We find Lizzie at the dinner table asking Elly if God invented everything. Elly tells her that she guesses so.

Panel 2: An unhappy Lizzie sighs and wonders why it is that he invented peas.

Panel 3: Having overheard the horrible criticism of the food she cooked with all the love in her great big heart, Elly responds to this attack on her person by telling Lizzie that the peas she cooked because she loves her family are good for her and she should thus prove that she loves her mother by eating them if she wants to leave the table.

Panel 4: Lizzie stares despondently at the tasteless mound of crap posing as real peas and wonders why Mommy hates her.

Panel 5: She then says that she'll eat eleben of dem.

Panel 6: She then counts off the peas.

Panel 7: Having done so, she asks if she can leave the table.

Panel 8: As she clears the plate off the table, Elly tells her that she guesses so.

Panel 9: Having noticed that Lizzie simply put the peas on the table so she wouldn't have to choke the tasteless things down, Elly screams her full name at her.

Summary: I get that it's a pain in the ass to have to watch kids turn down food. What I don't get is that Elly never God-damned learned to pick her battles. Then again, I also don't get why she makes the automatic assumption that rejecting her slop means rejecting her. A person can love her and not want to choke swill down merely because the person cooking it has no taste buds.