November 23rd, 2013

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 24 November 2013

Today, Elly loses her shit like an idiot because her hateful, chaos-loving, mother-hating four-year old has embarrassed her FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by asking an old lady why she's got wrinkles.

(Strip Number 7172, Original Publication Date, 25 November 1984)

Panel 1: It would appear that Elly is having company over owing to her wearing a nice dress. As she gets ready to bring in the tea, she tells Lizzie that she hopes that she'd washed her hands before taking the cookies out of the box.

Panel 2: Since Lizzie is, like, what, FOUR, she doesn't know that licking them clean ain't good enough nor does she know why Mommy's eyes are bugging out.

Panel 3: We begin the strip proper with Mrs Baird thanking Elly for inviting her over for a cuppa.

Panel 4: She then gushes about how lovely it is that little Elizabeth has been staring at her with respect like a little angel.

Panel 5: This belief that Lizzie is somehow angelic isn't going to last; that's because Lizzie is about to ask an awkward question.

Panel 6: Mrs Baird yes-dears Elizabeth because she assumes that she's about to get sweet, sweet smoke blown up her ass.

Panel 7: When Lizzie asks why her skin don't fit, Mrs Baird is taken aback and Elly does a Danny Thomas spit take.

Summary: I can see Mrs Baird not getting children; after all, she couldn't have kids and thus never quite picked up on how they act. Her not realizing that Lizzie isn't some monster trying to insult her because Satan and Chaos make her hate goodness is almost understandable. Elly, on the other hand, has had damned near a decade to figure out what makes kids tick; her acting as if Lizzie's decision to plagiarize Family Circus is the moral equivalent of ax murder is only understandable if you assume that she's a high-functioning alcoholic.