November 2nd, 2013

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 3 November 2013

The Halloween 1984/2013 note ends on a sour note as Lizzie tries to extort concessions from Michael in exchange for candy.

(Strip Number 7170, Original Publication Date, 4 November 1984)

Panel 1: We start things off with Lizzie responding to Mike's wanting to see what she's got left in her trick-or-treat bag by grabbing onto it like a starving octopus.

Panel 2: She opens it just enough to say it's opened when she tells him he can have just the one peek.

Panel 3: Since John hoovered down Mike's Whoopee Bars like a disgusting, greedy pig, Michael wants to trade some of his candy for one of the three chocolate bars she has left; she's willing to talk deal.

Panel 4: The thing is that she's not willing to trade it for the four jawbreakers that he initially offers her.

Panel 5: She's also unmoved by the chance to trade it for a red licorice and jumbo fireball.

Panel 6: It's also no sale to his offer of his popcorn ball and two bubble gums.

Panel 7: He asks her what she is willing to trade for it.

Panel 8: What she's willing to trade for it is something he isn't willing to give: being nice to her forever.

Panel 9: He demonstrates this by freaking out about how she's gotta be out of her fat little mind if she thinks he's going to go against his nature and be nice to her forever and always and get ragged on by his hoodlum friends and whatever the Hell other stupid excuses he uses for being a jerkwad JUST for one lousy chocolate bar.

Panel 10: When she goes back to accepting his initial offer of the jawbreakers, Mike is gobsmacked.

Summary: This seems to be his universal reaction to having to be the victim of the shit he pulls on everyone else in the world. Not so nice having your goat got, is it, Stupid?! As for the greedy asshole Dad who thought that he could just help himself to the candy his obviously oblivious son couldn't possibly keep track of (because kids are STUPID), John will get his tomorrow when he has to have a filling replaced.