December 10th, 2011

Angry Candiru

Sunday, 11 December 2011

Today's strip is inspired by an incident in Lynn's childhood; it seems that some malicious little jackass told her that if someone unscrewed her belly-button, her arse would fall off. Since Mike's need to only listen to people who want to hurt him has to come from somewhere, the dodo believed him; when she whined to Merv, he told that no, that wouldn't happen but if she kept pouting like that, her face would freeze that way.

(Strip Number 6095, Original Publication Date, 12 December 1982)

Panel 1: We start things off with Lizzie sitting on the couch contentedly sucking her thumb.

Panel 2: John smiles as he pulls her hand out of her mouth with an audible pop. Since he's a bit thick, he doesn't actually notice that this 'helpful' gesture isn't appreciated.

Panel 3: He then saunters off and tells her that if she keeps doing that, it'll fall off; since his back is turned, he doesn't realize that he's left her vulnerable to the other insensitive prick male: Michael. 

Panel 4: Mike grins a hateful grin when he tells her that if she presses her belly-button, her legs will fall off.

Panel 5: Lizzie tries sticking up for herself by greeting his assholish comment with a Bronx cheer.

Panel 6: Since he cannot let any attempt to defend herself stand, he tells her that if she blows raspberries like that her ears will fall off.

Panel 7: We see the results of his success: a small child backed into a corner screaming in helpless terror.

Panel 8: Elly comes in and asks a crying Lizzie what's wrong.

Panel 9: She wails 'I falling apart!!!!" in a sort of terror that would melt the heart of anyone remotely human. That lets John and Mike out right there, people.

Summary: Panel 10 would have probably taken the form of a panicky John and Mike doing that stupid God-damned palms out gesture as they convinced weak-minded Elly that Lizzie is too young to be so sensitive. What? You expected them to admit that they're in the wrong? That's only for the weak.