March 20th, 2010

Snarky Candiru2

Sunday, 21 March 2010

I have no real idea what'll appear today; I'd like to think that it might have something to do with the changing seasons but you never know with Lynn.

It seems that Lynn is starting to use up Sunday strips from 1980 now; that's because we get this oldie-but-baddie about Elly getting ready for an evening out:

Panel 1: We start off with Goggle-Eyed Elly anxiously reading "Hair" magazine to see what the styles are now.

Panel 2: She then yells "I am not leaving this house with this same old hairstyle!!!"


Panel 4: ...and stares the Bug-Eyed Glare of Horror at the less than flattering results.

Panel 5: She furiously BRAID-POKE-PIN-COMB-JAB-TIEs her hair into place...

Panel 6: ...and glares angrily at the resultant proto-Ellybun.

Panel 7: She's starting to, as Michael Stipe would call it, lose her religion now so her COMB-PIN-TWIST-POKE-BRUSHing her hair isn't going to end well.

Panel 8: We next get a reminder that Lynn really loves Peanuts because Elly yells "AAAAAAAUUUUUGGGGHHHHHH!!!!" as if she were the Blockhead himself.

Panel 9: John, who's been standing just outside the bedroom door all this time and has thus heard his wife's meltdown, is more than a little apprehensive when Elly says "Okay, now I'm ready."

Panel 10: As we see Elly sporting both the same perfectly serviceable hairdo she started with and a self-righteous frown, John glares right at us and thought-bubbles "A smart man asks no questions."

Summary: What makes this really funny is that we know that the Elly of the not-too-distant future has to be talked into changing her hair-style owing to the belief that her coiffure is her identity.
Indignant Candiru

Travelogue, Day Nine

I'm setting up this thread just in case Lynn updates her blog this weekend. Let's see what sort of mess she makes this time.

She starts off by forgetting she already had a Part Eight (it's Part Nine now, by the way) and goes downhill from there:

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- Lynn's inability and/or refusal to get Thai names right strikes again. Whot a vulgarity.
- Next, she takes another nasty swipe at people who aren't crippled by anorectic thinking.
- Her description of Muay Thai boxing leaves quite a lot to be desired; that's because she lets her animosity towards sports and sports fans shine through. Rabble, indeed!!!
- Lane seems to have been stuck baby-sitting her for a lot of the day and she didn't like it.
- I also don't much care for her looking down at local customs or her sniffing about offensive imagery; anyone capable of producing CHOMP-CHEW-GLUT-SLOP-SLURP and "I HAVE NO HOOOOOME!!" hasn't a leg to stand on on THAT score.
- We should have expected that she had never heard of some of the more 'exotic' fruit; this bothers me because it shows how out of it she is.
- We next head to a long, dull section about local "varmints", a plug for Off and a confusing and inaccurate description of the role of the elephant in Thai culture.
- This leads us to the meat in this rancid stew: her paternalistic view-point; when she isn't condemning the Thai people for adopting Western customs and music, she gushes about how swell it would be to ship children off to monasteries to learn them some manners. Insert angry comment "You first, crazy woman" here.
- Her incoherent ramblings about the construction of a huge Buddha are the least anyone who can read at a fifth-grade level or above could produce....which is entirely the problem.
- This becomes especially annoying when you realize that she's provided us a date for all this; Lunar New Year, to be exact. Since she's had a month to get this up to code and hasn't, you start to wonder about her dedication to craft.