February 24th, 2009

Snarky Candiru2

Wednesday, 25 February 2009

It seems to me that we're long overdue for a pointlessly hateful comment from John about Elly's need to slim down so that's probably what's going to appear today.

I hate being right.

Panel 1: We start off in the bathroom as Elly gets done bathing Lizzie for the day. John says that he wishes that she'd stop worrying about her weight.

Panel 2: She's fine the way she is and he'll love her no matter what.

Panel 3: He then makes life harder for himself by telling a lame joke. He starts off by reminding her of an article he'd read that states that if a man wants to know what his wife will look like in twenty years, he only need look at her mother.

Panel 4: He did just that and married her anyway so what's a few pounds and a few wrinkles? As he does so, the wave of hostility that radiates from his wife darkens the very air around him. He's about to get hit with a coffee cup.

Summary: The problem, of course, is that he doesn't quite seem to understand how negative his wife is. He honestly seems to mean that she's attractive despite or even because she's zaftig. He has no idea that she's programmed to take things in the most pointlessly negative light possible and thus thinks that he called her fat and ugly and she's supposed to be both because she's just his wife and blah-blah-blah-I'm-angry-and-won't-say-why.