February 19th, 2009

Indignant Candiru

Friday, 20 February 2009

I got ahead of myself yesterday by predicting that Lynn would follow through on a plot; we might continue to see Elly make the rounds either trolling for sympathy or feeling superior to the living muck that surround her. In any event, it's difficult to cheer her on because we know what she's fated to become.

One of the things she's fated to become is a sedentary weak sister whining about the cruel effort of having to perform any sort of exercise; this pointless torment must, of course, be celebrated by eating muffins and drinking a double-double.

Panel 1: We're at a clothing store or some sort as Annie tells Elly that these jogging suits will really help.

Panel 2: As she looks at herself in the mirror, Elly whines that she feels silly because she's not the athletic type. I believe her; she's more the "stuff her face full of greasburgers and wishtfully moan about how fat she is" type.

Panel 3: Annie answers this object by pointing out that once they hit the street in those, they'll fell like running.

Panel 4: After all, if they simply walk, they'll look like idiots.

Summary: You heard it here, folks: cardiovascular exercise is as crazy as eating sensible portions of healthy foods. This, of course, means that Lynn has no idea how to maintain her figure and will have Elly simper about how she doesn't have the tiiiiiiiiime to exercise and it's too haaaaaaaaaaard and she haaaaaaaaaaaaates it in her weekly letter.

Rod Speaks! (plus photo)

From the official Lynn Lake website:

"The final speaker at the September 10th, 2006 reunion banquet was Rod Johnston. His recollection of various events from the early years in Lynn caused roars of laughter and garnered applause many times. Regrettably, it is impossible to properly convey his enthusiasm and obvious enjoyment of the subject matter in the text transcript from the tape I recorded. I have tried to keep as faithful as possible to his spoken words: