November 30th, 2008

Bemused Candiru

Monday, 1 December 2008

It's a new month and new week of dailies and probably a new banner. The only thing that isn't new is the material. We're bound to see poop jokes as Farley leaves landmines on the rug, Lizzie clinging to Elly like a barnacle, John being a dick, Mike being a lunkhead, Deanna being a fusspot and Elly moaning and shrieking. What we won't see is a reason for this mess.

ETA: It's Annie moaning and shrieking to Elly about how unfair it is that she gains weight despite eating organic foods without realizing it's not what's in it, it's how much of it you eat.

Panel 1: AS Elly reads one of her cookbooks (Fun with Wheat Germ), Annie tells her that she can't understand why she can't lose weight.

Panel 2: After all, she buys naturally-grown, organic produce and does all her own baking. Meanwhile, Elly is so startled that her friend is giving her the finger, she drops The Victorious Vitamin.

Panel 3: Annie then moans "How can something so healthy be so fattening?" This betrays a certain lack of foresight and brainpower on her part. It doesn't matter how healthy or natural something is; if you eat enough of it, you'll get just as chubby as you do pounding down processed crap.

Summary: We're in for a week of this ding-dong lecturing Elly about her obsessions. When you realize this nitwit refuses to accuse her philandering jerk husband of cheating on her because she won't see the signs, you're sort of glad that Elly let their friendship slip away.

ETA: Lynn has unveiled her banner for the first part of December. Remember, there are twenty-four snarking days till Christmas.

Retail frenzy

Okay, we all know about the Wal-Mart worker who was crushed to death on Black Friday. After I'd digested that, and read the lengthy discussions about what can/should be done about shopping frenzies, I was reminded of this Foob sequence from the '80s, Collapse )