August 17th, 2005

Wednesday, August 18

Panel 1: Oh, Anthony, I hate to see you so upset! Let's pull over and go for a stroll! It's not like I have anything else on my mind right now.

I must say, the body language and dialogue are well suited to each other in this strip, even if I don't appreciate the net result. Anthony, stoic, back straight and hands in pockets. Liz, demure, arms raised to hold her hair in place and lift her breasts. "How can you say that?" she asks. How? Because if he said "Therese and I are having a hard time getting along," Liz might think it's up to him to work out his own problems. But "She doesn't love me" puts her on the spot to make up for this terrible injustice.

Panel 2: I really don't see how someone stops loving someone else entirely, if they did to begin with, just because their career takes off. Anyway, what about the baby he forced Therese to have? That has nothing to do with it?

Panel 3: Why on earth are they sitting under a tree like a courting couple? The sheer arrogance is mind-boggling. She spends more time at work? You know, work does take time; how much time do you want her to spend at home? Would Deanna be a sympathetic character if she said that about Mike?

Panel 4: Anthony, it's not going to work because you don't really want it to work. You want an excuse to divorce and get with Liz. Just freakin' admit it. And that's a VERY valid question: What DO you want her to do?

Panel 5: BESIDES PUT YOUR HANDS ON HER RIGHT AFTER SHE'S BEEN ASSAULTED GONE AFTER! If you cared about her at ALL, you wouldn't hit her with this right now!!! "Wait for me!" So it's a foregone conclusion: divorce before the sacrifice baby is six months old. Yeah, Anth, I can see you're really trying. Ever think that Therese might have some post-partum issues? No, of course not. Because it's all about YOU. If she's not focused on you, she's a horrible person and the marriage is not worth saving.

Answers to the FOOBiverse quiz!

1. Lawrence and his first partner, Ben, split up when Ben: B Moved to Paris.

It was sad when it happened, but hey: at least one person in the FOOBiverse can build a life with someone they met as an adult, instead of pining for their first love and no one else will do!

2. Elly wears the bun because: C She thinks the back of her head is flat.

Hey, whatever.

3. Back when Candace was a bad influence on Liz, she encouraged Liz and Dawn to: D Smoke.

In middle school, Candace smoked in an effort to keep her weight down, so she could have "a figure to DIE for!" Liz and Dawn tried either one cigarette each or one cigarette between them. It was aversion therapy for them, but Candace still smokes. This is just something to remember when Becky is being crucified.

4. Which is NOT a John quote? C [On the size of Elly's butt] "There's no West for the reary!"

Sure sounds like something he'd say, though, huh?

5. Gerald is to April as ---- is to Mike: C Martha.

Mike and Martha were a couple from middle school through sophomore year. He met Rhetta the summer before his last year of high school. Tracey is Gordon's wife, and Dawn, being Liz's age, is too young for him, besides being his buddy Brian's sister. Just wanted to clear that up in case some people were being led astray by those who insist Mike and Deanna were together in high school. She didn't even live in Milborough then.

6. April visited injured Jeremy in the hospital, but she didn't become sympathetic towards him until she found out that: B His absentee dad plays the harmonica.

Incidentally, Cookie Monster took that to mean that his dad is in prison. I disagree: Mrs. Jones had said one panel earlier that her (ex?) husband is in a traveling band, so I think he just literally plays the harmonica and that's it. I don't think a 10 y/o would get the prison-harmonica implication, and therefore have the Look of Dawning Comprehension that April gets in reponse to that statment. Plus, I think if it were meant metaphorically, "plays the harmonica" would be in "quotes".

7. When did Liz stop living in denial about Eric's cheating? B When she brought his skates to the hockey rink and he wasn't there.

D didn't happen at all. A and C did, but in those instances, she let Eric turn the situation around on her so she'd have to apologize for doubting him. Not sure why the penny dropped for her in the case of B; perhaps because someone said Eric had been coming to games, when he did play, with another girl, and for whatever reason, she was unable to justify that. (I think Liz did have reason to suspect that Tina was the young woman Eric was cheating with, based on her expression before she dialed Tina's number during her search for Eric after he gave her the visiting-mom excuse. Just couldn't face the picture she'd get if she put all the pieces together, I suppose: that was also the sequence in which a strip ended with her saying, "Eric! Tell me! I'll believe you!")

8. Who called April rude, and why? D Anthony, for asking if Gordon was rich.

This was, of course, before he became a giant life-sucking black hole of need.

9. Place the following events in chronological order: 1. Liz moves to Mtwhatsit 2. Kortney threatens April 3. 4-Evah founded 4. Mike is named senior editor C 3, 4, 2, 1

The band got started in January of '03, with Smoochgate taking place mostly in February. Mike returned to Portrait in the late summer of '03. April began working at the store shortly after school started in the fall, and discovered Kortney websurfing in October. Liz became Breath From Lizard in the fall of '04.

10. Okay, so this question wasn't exactly fair. But as I've said, none of this is supposed to trip people up! Personally, I'd have to go with A, Mike's hilarious essay, because in order for the current storyline to be "lame", it would have to be plausible to begin with.