dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote in binky_betsy,

New Year's Day, 2021

If you'll indulge me, I'd like to conclude my look at the world of the Unauthorized Liographies by showing you how someone outside the circle of family would have to interpret John and Elly's legacy of failure, incompetence and entitlement:

Dear Diary: Well, it's that time of the year again. Time to take stock of the year gone by and speculate as to what is to come. Long since past are the days of my youth when it seemed that I had forever to get things right, long gone are the nights spent getting gooned at childish parties drinking kiddie cocktails and long gone are a crap-load of the other revelers of the sixties, seventies and eighties. Now that the days are more precious, I find myself being glad to wake and grateful for each morning despite having pissed away so many days on the trivial and unworthy. Speaking of that depressing tendency, I had the oddest experience today. That's because there was some sort of marathon about model railroaders in this year's pledge drive on WNED. I'd wondered why that sent shivers down my back when they had a story about some fellow my age living in the North Bay area. The reason I felt as if someone was walking over my grave is that when I was watching this man talk about his hobby, I'd thought about my 'buddy', the late and not especially lamented that I'm aware of John Patterson for the first time in what had to be three years. For a second or two, I'd berated myself for being a callous idiot who threw him under the bus only to forget him after his death what with having a brief fling with his wife and his raising the only child of mine whose name I know for sure. After all, it took me years to learn to let go of all the people who mattered in my life like my folks or my hero Grant so it left me feeling cross with myself that someone I saw as my sidekick vanished from the halls of 'those who've gone before' so rapidly. After all, his son, daughter-in-law and their children are my most loyal patients, Elizabeth is the best assistant a flying doctor could have asked for and April is sort of a niece that I still don't quite feel like I deserve to have so it bothers me that his 'legacy' is that he and Elly manifest as an absence. Surely there is something about him that I can be troubled to actually remember saying to me or doing for me that I can recollect. Sadly, the last thing I do remember is how his lack of brains damned near killed him back in 2013 and how angry it made me that he simply couldn't be asked to think about what he was doing. It's very odd but I feel more of a connection with my old rival for Connie's affections than I do him. Ah, well. Discovering how John and Elly made the world a better place should keep my mind occupied for a while longer. They say it's good to keep the grey matter chugging along and this oughta do it.

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