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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
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|Saturday, March 15th, 2014|
Sunday, 16 March 2014
Today's effort has Lizzie destroy Elly's ability to express herself by fiddling with a tiny little hole
in her slacks that Elly could justify patching until it becomes a great big hole that Elly has to waste money and toss the track pants instead of leaving them on the mending pile to die.
(Strip Number 6150, Original Publication Date, 17 March 1985)Panel 1:
We start things off with Lizzie reaching into a dresser drawer so she can get dressed for the day.Panel 2:
She then puts her top on.Panel 3:
As she puts on her slacks, she thought-bubbles'bout how they gotsa hole in the knee.Panel 4:
She then shoves her hand into her pants so she can stick her finger through the whole.Panel 5:
Next, she widens the hole because she seems to have nothing better to do with her free time.Panel 6:
She then pulls at the hole to make it even bigger.Panel 7:
By now, the hole is large enough for her to look at through an impromptu spyglass.Panel 8:
Finally, Elly shows up and screams Lizzie's name. Those of us who are picky-faces prove that we deserve to be in cages by muttering "About TIME!!!" when it's obvious that Elly had far more important things to do than to supervise small children.Panel 9:
Elly calls Lizzie's attention to the hole in the knee of her slacks and asks how it happened.Panel 10:
Lizzie doesn't know because they were like that when she found them.Summary:
The underlying premise to this mess is that Lizzie is lying about things to oppress and ruin Elly's life. The problem is that while Lizzie did a "bad" thing, she doesn't understand what she did and is answering as truthfully as possible. What's more, Elly's super-futile solution is to just leave stuff on the mending pile until she tosses it anyway.
|Friday, March 14th, 2014|
Saturday, 15 March 2014
Father Bob bows out by making a mildly humorous observation
about the human condition.
(Strip Number 4481, Original Publication Date, 16 March 1985)Panel 1:
Now that the two of them have arrived in Winnipeg, Father Bob tells Elly that it was a pleasure flying with her.Panel 2:
She agrees it was a pleasurable trip. Panel 3:
As Elly searches through her purse, she tells him that can't find her itinerary and that she wishes she knew where she was going,Panel 4:
He responds by saying "Don't we all!"Summary:
Well, this is it for him because we don't see him on the return flight. Then again, we don't see the return flight at all. What we do see is John and the kids cleaning up beforehand.
|Thursday, March 13th, 2014|
Friday, 14 March 2014
Father Bob tells Elly that being stuck in business class means having to deal with
(strip Number 818, Original Publication Date, 15 March 1985)Panel 1:
A few minutes after the mild non-joke at the Big G's expense, the flight attendant asks Elly if she wants wine with dinner. Panel 2:
Today's menu options are Chicken Kiev or Filet Mignon. Panel 3:
Elly thinks it sounds great and wonders what first class gets that they don't. Panel 4:
Father Bob jokes that they get real cutlery.Summary:
Well, at least they aren't traveling on the plane Jon Arbuckle always ends up on. They always get hardtack and gruel.
|Wednesday, March 12th, 2014|
Thursday, 13 March 2014
When Elly explains what she's doing heading to Winnipeg, Father Bob makes a mild joke about dealing with the Feds.
(Strip Number 4480, Original Publication Date, 14 March 1985) Panel 1:
On the plane to Winnipeg, Father Bob tells Elly that he is going to a meeting to get a government grant. Panel 2:
Elly tells him she's attending a puppetry workshop. Panel 3:
The padre then jokes about how odd it is that they are involved in similar projects,Panel 4:
This is because they're both pulling strings.Summary:
Ah, well. At least Lynn's a non-partisan inept critic of Big Government. That's something.
|Monday, March 10th, 2014|
|Tuesday, March 11th, 2014|
Wednesday, 12 March 2014
As Father Bob notices that a cowed-looking Elly is too intimidated by his being a clergyman to tell him to turn down the AC, he smooths things over by making a bit of a pun about
his path in life.
(Strip Number 817, Original Publication Date, 13 March 1985)Panel 1:
As Elly sits there shivering, she tries to thought-bubble herself into asserting herself and just turning off the vent, but gets her coat from the overhead luggage bin instead.Panel 2:
Having realized that the woman next to him is freezing and miserable but not willing to do anything because she thinks saying anything the least bit critical to a priest will make Phil the Prince of Insufficient Light darn her to Heck for the duration of her trip, Father Bob apologizes for making her uncomfortable and turns down the vents.Panel 3:
He then comments on the material of her coat.Panel 4:
He begins smoothing things over with the poor, passive woman sitting next to him by making a mild joke about how he knows such things what with being a man of the cloth and all.Summary:
As I said, Father Bob turns out to be an okay kind of a guy with a penchant for punny humor. He seems to know how to smooth ruffled feathers and we'll be seeing that all week.
|Monday, March 10th, 2014|
Tuesday, 11 March 2014
Today's strip has Father Bob turn the air conditioning on full blast
and then asking a freezing Elly if it constitutes a problem.
(Strip Number 6025, Original Publication Date, 12 March 1985)Panel 1:
A few minutes into the flight, we find Elly watching Father Bob reach overhead and turn up one of the air conditioning vents.Panel 2:
He then alarms Elly as he turns on the second vent.Panel 3:
Elly does an impression of the guy in the Maxell ad as he turns on the third vent.Panel 4:
He then turns to a shivering Elly and asks her to tell him if it bothers her.Summary:
That ain't happening any time soon, Padre!! She's been raised to defer to men of the cloth and would probably freeze all the way to Winterpeg rather than talk back to you.
|Sunday, March 9th, 2014|
Monday, 10 March 2014
In today's strip, Elly's enthusiasm about who she'll be sitting next to fades away
when it's revealed that she's sitting next to an elderly clergyman.
(Strip Number 816, Original Publication Date, 11 March 1985)Panel 1:
We start things off with Elly boarding the plane for Winnipeg. As the PA system tells her where to go and how to get there, she smiles and thought-bubbles about how great she feels. Panel 2:
She reminds herself that she hasn't flown solo for a loooooooong time. Panel 3:
As she walks to her seat, the anticipation of discovering who her seatmate will be has her excited.Panel 4:
Upon finding out that her super-dynamic companion is a grumpy looking priest reading a door-stopper of a book, she is a little intimidated. (Actually, she's terrified out of her mind but 'intimidated' is what she'll tell her family later to save face.)Summary:
Ah, my. She might not be the most devout member of the flock but Sunday School was only just yesterday for her. Good thing that Father Bob (we have to name him SOMETHING!!) turns out to be an okay guy.
|Saturday, March 8th, 2014|
Sunday, 9 March 2014
In today's strip, Elly is horrified when Mike and Lizzie decide to have breakfast
(Strip Number 7178, Original Publication Date, 10 March 1985)Panel 1:
We start things off with Mike and Lizzie in their pjs. For some reason, Lizzie is watching him stand on a chair so he can root through the kitchen cupboard.Panel 2:
Mike then hands Lizzie the box of sugar cereal he retrieved from the cupboard.Panel 3:
The strip most people will see starts with Mike and Lizzie carrying the sugar cereal upstairs.Panel 4:
Next, Mike carries a pitcher of milk upstairs.Panel 5:
We then see Lizzie carrying bowls upstairs.Panel 6:
We see poor Elly awoken by her horrible children for the horrible reason of their loving chaos and yearning to destroy her because children are evil and love chaos and hate their mothers. Panel 7:
Rage-faced Elly stomps upstairs so as to see what evil thing her children are doing besides waking her up at the impossible hour of 7:35 AM on a Sunday morning. Panel 8:
Judging from the fact that her eyes have bulged out of their sockets, it's obvious that Elly has been traumatized for LIFE because her cruel, selfish children are destroying her ability to express herself by having breakfast in bed and getting the sheets all messy because children are EVIL CREATURES who love CHAOS and yearn to DESTROY the poor mother they HATE and whatever other stupid things Elly tells herself so that she can witlessly piss away her life by taking every God-damned thing too God-damned seriously. Meanwhile, normal people are muttering "Oh, for the love of someone or other" and rolling their eyes in irritation at two dumb kids who did something stupid because they wanted to play-act at being real grown-ups. Summary:
This, of course, is yet another example of Elly and her addiction to seeing the apocalypse in every minor screw-up. Eventually, she speculates that doing so seems to have stolen most
of her time.
|Friday, March 7th, 2014|
Saturday, 8 March 2014
We end the week with the weepy little boy inside Mike winning out over the
cool customer he'd like to be thought of as.
(Strip Number 815, Original Publication Date, 9 March 1985)Panel 1:
As Elly is about to board the plane, she hugs John and Lizzie.Panel 2:
When Michael astonishes her by giving her a handshake, he allows as how he's too old to be caught hugging his mommy in public.Panel 3:
When the call to board comes, she turns and says that it's time to go so goodbye for mow. Just then, Mike yells "WAIT!!!!"Panel 4:
He then bawls his eyes out as he tells her goodbye.Summary:
This is sort of nice in a depressing little way. It's also Michael remembering how long good-byes can get. Sadly, it's also an open invitation for Lynn to bitch about how clingy Aaron is and how he wanted to greedily and selfishly eat her ability to express herself because MEN ARE TEH SUCKS.
|Thursday, March 6th, 2014|
The Strawberry Jam Tyrant and Why The Treasuries Are Subpar.
It would seem that in my haste to talk about Lynn's stupid letter,
I forgot about this clue as to why they are so blasted cheap-looking:( I'm in charge!! I'm in charge!!!Collapse )
- When you look at the photo of Laura "helping" Lynn, you will immediately notice the same thing that howtheduck did: Laura being firmly shooed away from doing anything that would interfere with Lynn's control of the situation. If the woman is unable to let her own grandchild get a little messy because that would mean that she's not one hundred percent in charge (and thus totally helpless), we're not dealing with a woman who'd shrug and let Fantagraphics or IDW do the treasuries properly because she confuses surrendering a little bit of control to surrendering ALL of it.
- Laura's hair is in that ghastly propeller topknot that the Martian wears.
Friday, 7 March 2014
In today's strip, John makes an arch comment about how much Elly
(Strip Number 4479, Original Publication Date, 8 March 1985)Panel 1:
We find the Pattersons at the terminal building. As John struggles with Elly's luggage, he asks her if she's carrying an anvil.Panel 2:
She tells him that she's packed some books for his dad and some records for his sister.Panel 3:
As they pass by the flight insurance kiosk, she asks him if she should buy some. He says no.Panel 4:
He does, however, hope that the baggage handler has Blue Cross.Summary:
Har-de-freaking-HAR, Johnny. Make your wife feel like a jerk just because you're out of shape.
|Tuesday, March 4th, 2014|
|Wednesday, March 5th, 2014|
Thursday, 6 March 2014
Elly goes on a spending spree because she thinks that getting free tickets
means that everything else is free as well.
(Strip Number 814, Original Publication Date, 7 March 1985)Panel 1:
We start things off with John's eyes bulging out of their sockets; this is because Elly has bought a new suitcase for her trip.Panel 2:
She's also bought a whole new wardrobe just for the occasion.Panel 3:
Since John's brain hasn't caught up with the fact that they can easily afford all of this, Elly tells him to stop staring at her like she's trying to put them in the poorhouse. Panel 4:
After all, this is a free trip so it isn't costing them a cent. Since John remembers that only the tickets and accomodation are free, he doesn't quite see it that way.Summary:
What bothers me most about John's frugality is that it always seems to kick in when Elly wants something nice for herself. It's as if Lynn is sending Rod a message about all of the silly things he wasted money on when she had needs of her own. Needs like not living in a town full of adultery-loving jerks who hated her and loved the flying dentist and so on and so forth.
|Tuesday, March 4th, 2014|
Wednesday, 5 March 2014
John tells Elly that the prospect of her managing well without him scares him
as it implies that the world won't
fall apart when he dies.
(Strip Number 4478, Original Publication Date, 6 March 1985)Panel 1:
Later that night, we find John and Elly in bed. As they settle down for the nightly coma, John confesses that he will miss Elly while she's away. She then reminds him that it's only for a few days.Panel 2:
He then sets things up by saying that he worries about her traveling alone.Panel 3:
She assures him that she's a grown woman who's perfectly capable of managing on her own.Panel 4:
He stuns her by stating that this is what he's really afraid of.Summary:
As the "no comparison" strip that we see at the end of the arc tells us, it's who she's going to manage with that seems to bother him. He does admit that she's not helpless but he's sort of worried that she's realize this and leave or something.
|Monday, March 3rd, 2014|
Tuesday, 4 March 2014
Mike uses Elly's comment about getting away from it all in order to plant a Mike seed in Lizzie's brain
that grows into the rank weed of her feeling as if she doesn't fit in anywhere.
(Strip Number 4477, Original Publication Date, 5 March 1985)Panel 1:
As Elly packs for her trip, Lizzie asks her why she gotsa go away.Panel 2:
Elly tells her that it's for business. Panel 3:
She then sets up the rather nasty punchline by telling her now nice it'll be to get away from things. Panel 4:
This allows Mike to traumatize Lizzie by whispering that SHE is one of the things from which Elly wants to get away.Summary:
The reason that he can say this so brazenly is that he suspects that he is ALSO one of the things Elly wishes to flee from. Sadly, this realization is at war with his suspicion that life was perfect and he was loved before the unwanted interloper arrived. Fool. He was always treated as a happiness-eating burden. Also, he's too stupid to understand that this sort of crap is why Mom and Dad every so often tell him to be nicer to Lizzie.
|Sunday, March 2nd, 2014|
Monday. 3 March 2014
While John is cool with Elly taking a mental health week, Mike would rather not risk Daddy's cooking.
This is because he's developed a tolerance to crud and can't eat normal food.
(Strip Number 813, Original Publication Date, 4 March 1985)Panel 1:
We jump ahead a bit to just after Elly explains things to John. To her surprise, he thinks that a business trip to Winnipeg is a great opportunity for her.Panel 2:
Since she still can't quite believe it, she again asks him if he really doesn't mind. Panel 3:
In response, he says that he and the kids can survive on his cooking for a few days.Panel 4:
Mike stage-whispers to Lizzie that that depends if they've developed an antidote for male cooking yet. Summary:
Lynn should be careful with this sort of punchline given that she's established Elly as a rather dubious chef. The unwanted subtext of this sort of thing is that we're left with the impression that Mike and Lizzie would die if exposed to properly cooked food because they've gotten used to swallowing down Elly's crimes against nature.
|Saturday, March 1st, 2014|
Sunday, 2 March 2014
In today's strip, Mike and Lizzie heat up frozen plasticine
in order to play with it and promptly forget it.
(Strip Number 6149, Original Publication Date, 3 March 1985)Panel 1:
We start things off with Lizzie at the kitchen table trying to play with a hardened lump of plasticine. Since it's probably been frozen or something, she tries to thump it into pliability.Panel 2:
She again tries to hammer it into moldability but only manages to raise a cloud of sound-effects.Panel 3:
Having been defeated by an inanimate object, she just sits there looking glum.Panel 4:
When Primary Caregiver Mike appears, she tells him that she cannot play with the plasticine as it is too hard.Panel 5:
He advises her to do what he does and place it on the baseboard heaters to warm it up.Panel 6:
We see the two of them doing just that.Panel 7:
Mike smiles as he cranks up the thermostat.Panel 8:
He then turns on the television set and says that all they need do it wait for it to thaw.Panel 9:
As they do so, Elly finally makes the scene only to be traumatized by the vision of melting plasticine dripping all over everything.Summary:
I would have bet money that Elly would have appeared when Lizzie was hammering on the table. It's as if she has some sort of Elly-Sense that only goes off when things are too late to do anything about.
|Friday, February 28th, 2014|
Saturday, 1 March 2014
We end the week with Elly reminding herself that her guilt about leaving her family to shift for themselves
isn't going to be all that long-lasting.
(Strip Number 4476, Original Publication Date, 2 March 1985)Panel 1:
As she drives home, Elly is beside herself with glee that Susan wants her to go on a business trip.Panel 2:
She then wonders about how John and her children would react to this.Panel 3:
She also notes that she'd feel guilty and selfish for leaving them behind.Panel 4:
Well, at least she'd feel guilty and selfish for the hour it'd take for her to drive down from Milborough to Pearson International. After that, her conscience would be clear.Summary:
If it hasn't already happened, today would be the best chance of seeing a Lynnsight about how awful Lynn felt about going on her many, many business trips in support of being the primary source of income.